Tag Archives: life

The Destruction of Love

Anyone who thinks a relationship is sunshine and rainbows is wrong. It’s the worst thing in the world.
It’s also the best.

You’re going to go through hell. Get your head out of the clouds.

You’ll be borderline murderous. Attacking their every word. Reducing them and yourself to tears. And then you video call. They call you beautiful. And you’re reminded why it’s worth it.

The bad times are worth it.

Your pillow will get drenched. Your mind will get lost. Your heart will scream.

And then you make new memories. New quirks. New inside jokes.

Taking the risk of holding their hand means they will drag you through hell. But that hand will comfort you. Call you beautiful. Tell you they’ll never give up on you. Find that. Find the calm after the storm. I am the storm and so is he.

Love is destruction. Dangerous. Love is madness. Insanity. Love is nurturing. Lovely


I’m Scared Because I Love You

You annoy me.
This whole thing called life
It’s a chore.
You conjure my tears.
You provoke frustration
Pain, irritation, and anxiety.
You scare me.
Because I love you.

You say you can handle me.
But I’m a thunderstorm.
I will drag you through sleet
rain, hurricanes and lightening.
You’ll question everything.
You’ll go insane.

But don’t be so fragile.
Not everything is about you.
I let you be mad.
I let you have your time.
So don’t result to self loathing.

You drive me insane.
Another would have left.
I’m scared.
Because I love you.
Even if I don’t want to.
But I know I do.

I guess I just want it to be safe.
To be easy.
We have amazing conversations.
We make each other laugh till we hurt.
I’ve given up on a fairy tale.
They have fantasy creatures for a reason.

You see I get so close to giving up.
But I can’t.
I just can’t because I love you.
I’d be okay by myself.
If I didn’t know you.
I’m feisty.
But I’m not giving up because I love you.


So this is lies
A broken promise
A fractured trust
You beat yourself up
“Fail”, “stuffed up”, apologies
I wanted an explaination
I got an excuse
You promised, you lied, you excused
You keep going back
You keep forgiving
You drive me crazy
You lied

Goodbye 201(666)

I hate these new years revolutions things… No one ever sticks to them… They just make people feel better at the time… but I’m going to do a bucket list (things to do before 2017 kicks the bucket) I’ll update it each time I actually do the thing… if … Comment suggestions if you wish… please be reasonable.. nothing too illegal 😛

1. Not die (obvious but reasonable)

2. Do a random act of kindness for a stranger (flower on a car, leave money at a parking meter etc)

3. Write poetry whenever I need a release

4. Bake something every month

5. Get more than one A on my school reports

6. Read at least one novel completely

7. Write people I love notes and leave them secretly

8. Swim in the ocean this summer *(6/1)*

9. Buy a new pair of shoes

10. Watch movies and snuggle up with someone I love

11. Have and commit to a movie marathon

My Ocean

It’s a kind of storm. Out at sea.
My head is an ocean… sharks, shipwrecks, huge overwhelming waves.
The water falls out my eyes. The ocean is too full.
Boats crash on the rocks. The impact is felt on my temples.
Thunder roars in and over me and hot tears rip down my face.
All is quiet. Just drowning. Too much ocean. Stillness.
Impact. Collision with rocks.
It starts again. The storm. The swell. The over-flow. My ocean…

What If I Was Crazy?


Maybe we’re all just crazy
Unhinged, deranged, mad as a mercury-consuming-hatter

What if all our minds are filtering all this media propaganda about what shoes to wear, what diet to eat, what makeup makes you more acceptable, how to live, everything ‘satanic’ about gay marriage, everything wrong with not fitting into society.

Secretly in the back of our minds we dwell on whatif? What if? What if?


What if you didn’t buy that perfume, what if you went outside in bare feet, what if you didn’t puree our fruit and add chia seeds, what if you broke a nail, what if you dressed how you wanted to?

You tell me…



Why put yourself up to be judged? Every opinion is different. What does it matter? Live Standout Be a misfit! It doesn’t matter!


You have a choice! Be different! bE QuIRky! wHo CAres? Everyone is mad! Barking mad! “We are all mad here” so find your own Wonderland world.


See in this life, you have a purpose. For some it isn’t clear, like a fog-clad mirror. The answer would be so clear if one just remembered to wipe it clean.

That’s just it. It’s not always clear. Never easy. Never will be. But if you couldn’t handle it, you wouldn’t be here. That’s life.

You could paint in a silver lining. Dash it in a sugar coat. But unlike people, who, when masked, show their true identity.. life… – it just doesn’t.

I could apologise for this, perhaps you did not know the raw truth, but I won’t. I can’t.

You see in life, apologies are like the sun after rain… there is always relief. As much as you’d like to think it not true, it just doesn’t cut it. It doesn’t make the mirror all clear, just shinier, hazier, less useful.

Perhaps our brains choose what they want us to see. Perhaps the eyes know more than our conscious. Perhaps those who slip through the cracks, the misfits, the outcasts have mastered reality, its enigma and power beyond imagination. They don’t coat it, yet life is more magical.

If only one remembers to stop and dust away the sugar.